Gasping for every breath
▼ ▲
Life could have been so much more amazing.
Friday, December 23, 2011
Hi.
Is it weird to be feeling like you have never done enough? No matter how many comments you got, it never seems true at all.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Now comes the hardest part, getting too fucking attached. Reason why it would just kill me off so easily. I should really stop trying to let it go.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Sunday, December 04, 2011
You made me feel like everything i said or done was all worthwhile. Cause you are the one that made me lay my trust on you completely.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Hi!
All the hard work for the past 2 months, paid off. Thank you everybody. Thank you for giving us the chance. We dance, we laughed and we had fun together. Together as one, Engine.
The past 1 semester has made me felt like there's nothing better than a school like this.
Friday will be the big day! Engine20th, Let's go!
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Thursday, November 03, 2011
Hi!
Constantly trying to push myself. Have a positive mindset and fuck yeah i am able to do this.
You know at times when you are so tired and you just don't feel like doing anything? But you just have to do it cause you've responsibility. It's pretty fucked.
But after the whole thing, i found the joy in doing this. The feeling i get when i see everyone else having that smile on their faces. The bond they shared among each other. The joy and happiness the others had. All these. These are the one that made me go on cause the feeling is incredible.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Hi.
Holiday wasn't like a holiday to me. Chalet to have fun wasn't entirely fun at all. School starts and fucking suffering. When you have too many shit to handle, life is just fucked. Returned to school with a fucked up mindset, not wanting to do well but i have to do well no matter what. Lost my purpose of why am i here.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Monday, October 17, 2011
I really miss taking Camilla out for a stroll. Into the busy streets, and just walk around aimlessly, constantly snapping photos.
I should really give myself a slap for neglecting Camilla ):
SO,
i promise myself to not neglect Camilla anymore!
kay.
One day, i just need a day to dedicate myself to the library and all the shop houses.
It's strange that i have no idea what i want to do in the future. I feel lost all of a sudden. I guess this is what happen when you are doing what you don't really want to do initially. SIGH.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Saturday, September 24, 2011
I want to head out and run in a big empty field and play the whole damn day without having to worry about anything. At certain time, i need to clear my mind. I need something that would clear my mind.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Friday, September 09, 2011
Human are judgmental. Prove me wrong if you object.
Well i'm not saying it is a very bad thing, but sometimes it could be a really bad thing if you get what i mean.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Monday, May 16, 2011
Today at work, i met Peter who's from Colombia. He was desperate to get in touch with his wife back in Colombia but he needed help. I could hardly understand what he was talking about until he asked, "do you speak english?"
"Yeah!"
His words were vague, but somehow i managed.
For the past 30 minutes we were both figuring out how to make an international call with the card he provided me. Another 15 minutes passed, we finally did it! I felt so elated to see him grinning from ear to ear when he speak to his wife.
The last 15 minutes, i brought him to get his adapter and brought him to the LAN shop to use the internet.
Throughout the 15 minutes, he offered me drinks and lunch but i rejected his kind offer. That was actually a pretty contented hour spent with a stranger.
It made me remember about the time when i was staying in Korea. I was having difficulties conversing just to get an international calling card and let alone to make the phone call back to Singapore every night.. Alone at the street, freezing myself to death just to call home. I would be the luckiest kid if i were to find someone to help me then. It just made me want to help Peter so much cause I'd definitely want someone's help if i were in his shoes.
Hais, to think of it. I miss staying in Korea..
Okeh now i have get back to maths...
Me no like maths >:(
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Wednesday, May 04, 2011
"If you hold back on the emotions--if you don't allow yourself to go all the way through them--you can never get to being detached, you're too busy being afraid. You're afraid of the pain, you're afraid of the grief. You're afraid of the vulnerability that loving entails. But by throwing yourself into these emotions, by allowing yourself to dive in, all the way, over your heard even, you experience them fully and completely." — Mitch Albom
No, i really don't wish to be scraping through this time round. If only feelings are easier to control. If only i had more confidence with myself. Wouldn't life be so much easier.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Monday, April 11, 2011
hours ago, i am so pissed with myself for not getting things right..
One thing i really hate about myself, i love shortcuts. I'd start off with step 1 and then think that i'm too good and move on to step 8. Maybe this is why things never go the way i wanted. But today! I tried to kick that habit and move on step by step.
So i was practicing one of the moves which Terence asked us to do last week, AND I COULDN'T GET IT NICELY DONE FOR LIKE AN HOUR?!!!
Urgh! i felt like giving it up and sit down or laze around on my bed watching videos but NUUUUU, thankfully my mind was like "GO GO GOOOOO GET IT DONE!!!!!"
so yes, after much attempt and being pissed at myself, I GOT IT! Not perfectly done (which i think i still need lots of practise) but at least i am on the right track. I'm pleased with myself! Not exactly pleased but still delighted with myself!
Gotta reward myself if i can do this everyday for 1 month... GO GO GO!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Harlowwwwww (!)
Today wasn't practically bad i reckon. I woke up late for work and i was the only one wear uniform walking around DTE. It was everybody's off day and i had to go back and do paperwork for ETP. Sad life.
There's work again tomorrow at WWW! I have this strong urge to try out barista. At least i get to learn how to make coffee rightttttt? I don't really have to spend 6bucks ++ on Starbucks ice green tea latteeee~ he hee.
Oh! Just then, i got my Freshmen Orientation Camp notice that i'm in for the camp AND Orientation Programme. I am pretty excited for FOC but then at the same time, i hate the packing part and to stay elsewhere other than my house.
On the side track, i need to keep myself fit (!!!!!!) Yesterday's class was terrible, my legs instantly turned jelly after a series of warmups and bounces. How to dance like that!?!?! ENDURE, ENDURE & ENDURE!!!!
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Need shoes
(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //
Sunday, March 06, 2011
Save meee, i'm exhausted to the max.. but nevertheless, i shall post first before hitting the sack.
Yesterday was my 2nd day of work @ a whole new environment. Wasn't really bad but i enjoyed working there! Scooping scopes of frozen soy and churning and learning how to make ice-cream(!) & Danial was working as well, just in front of where i work, @ least there's someone i know.
After work, i was supposed to go for dinner with Trish, Mel and Sandy and then to meet Lun for Dance but who knows the insect bite which i gotten days ago @ PRP actually got so bad. It swelled and turned purplish. Scared the shit out of me.. Purple?!??!
But thankfully, i just happen to have really sensitive skin >:( But it's all better now (!!) Luckily!
Ended up @ home being panic.
3rd day @ work. It was tiring to the maxxxxx. At the knockoff time, M, Y, S, E, G and C appeared out of nowhere and they were heading where i want to head to as well! So i left work and headed to Scapeee. Parted ways at Scape while i went to Oschool and they went shopping.. After going to Oschool, headed to Bedok to meet T, T, J and S then back to Pasir Ris to reunite with M.
Mad hungry with just 3 mini bun and kimbap for the whole day plus everywhere in Ehub is full xcept pastamaniaaaa. So we had pastamania (!!)
Tx2 house after that & left for the last bus. Tired tired tired. Work tomorrow again for full 11 hours.. & enrollment not done yet. Hais hais hais.
▲ Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting //